YNA presents its very own Advice Column, featuring that opinionated yumar, Mr. Artisan P. Sunspot. No horoscopes here, folks, but if you want to ask Arty a question about almost anything, you can! Just type your question in the box, and submit! (Be sure to let Arty know who you are.)
Please, no vulgarity or any type of question that is inflammatory, racist, etc.. you get the idea.
Also, we should warn you.. Arty isn't the, well.. *nicest* of people. You're probably not going to get a nice answer. Don't take it personally, this is all part of the game. It's like one of those random insult generators, see. :>
Bottom line: If you're going to get offended, just Don't Ask Arty.
If you've read through the above and are cool with everything, go ahead and ask a question! Arty will reply as soon as he possibly can.
| Submit a Question Occasionally quote marks get eaten. Please try not to use them if you can get away with it. -Arty |
Last 100 Answered Questions
| This website is fugly. - :) | |
| Honey, I'm so pretty I make up for it in spades. | |
| Dear Arty. Why is that picture of you dressed in some kind of unholy combination of Renaissance European and Ancient Chinese clothes? - J.C Randmcollingwood@blueyonder.co.uk | |
| It is a traditional Japanese wedding costume. Do your research. | |
| Since you have a fin on your tail and web'd fingers and toe's, do you have to constantly keep them moist so they won't crack and split like a regular fish? - Feral, nabuza@hotmail.com | |
| The webs, no. The tail, yes. It's mostly cartilage covered in scales, and they tend to crack and peel if my fin is too dry for too long. I have sweat glands at the end of my tail, where the fin meets the fur, which help keep it moist when it's hot out, bu | |
| Hey Arty, since when have you been together with your fianceeß - Naruo | |
| I don't have a fiancee (that's a girl you're engaged to), I have a partner, and we've been together.. hmm, about eight years? | |
| What would your reaction to a shuffling zombie horde be? Are you shit scared of them, or would you be revving the chainsaw as soon as you saw the yellow/greens of their eyes? =P - Aeth, Aetherfax@hotmail.com | |
| I'd wonder if I was having college flashbacks. Muttering, stumbling hordes of slow moving, slow witted mouth breathers? Sounds like monday morning class to me. | |
| Who is your favorite ninja turtle? - CupcakeCaptain@yahoo.com | |
| The one who does "Ask a Ninja" | |
| Hey Arty! Krispy Kreme, Dunkin Donuts, or both? - Rex, corelog@livejournal.com | |
| You must be new here. | |
| Whats the best beer in america? the canadian moosehead is ace and im tired of drinking bitter in the pub. - Kobrag | |
| Old Dominion Rootbeer. Made in the wonderful hills of Virginia. | |
| If you could get away with one crime, with no penalty whatseoever, what would you do? - Anthony/evankimori@gmail.com | |
| Doll, I get away with being -this- amazingly gorgeous. What crime would have a reward comparable to this? | |
| What colour is Vinci's butt? - Smellyfaaace | |
| Cute. | |
| How do you choose your clothes in the morning? - davejn@comcast.net | |
| I choose them the night before, because it takes so long for me to iterate through all the available combinations to find the most perfect compliment to my beauty points during that lunar cycle, if I wait until morning, I'll be late for work. | |
| If a duck claps one hand in the middle of a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it echo? And whose hand is it? - | |
| Pardon me, but I think your giraffe is on fire. Here is a green hamster, please shake vigorously, and get off the drugs. | |
| I ate all of your donuts... Is this okay? - CupcakeCaptain@yahoo.com | |
| Those weren't mine of course, I'd never leave a donut alone long enough for it to be stolen. Must have been Vinci's... and most likely not a donut then. | |
| What would you do if you woke up one day and found Vinci with an ego/attitude for himself that matches yours? - Random question man | |
| I'd say it was about fucking time he got some balls. | |
| How do you politely tell a person who smells like con-funk to take a bath? - Draig | |
| Set them on fire. | |
| Do you ever think about using your prettiness for evil? - Scruff | |
| Let me tell you girlfriend, when you look as pretty as me, -nothing- you do is evil. | |
| How do you write with webbed paws? - Foxie | |
| They only come up to the first knuckle. Secondly, computer keyboards. I just can't wear rings. | |
| Have you ever considered trying yoga like Vinci did? - Tlaren21@yahoo.com | |
| I can already lick myself, with my leg behind my head. Do you really think I need -more-? | |
| I'm small and therefore well-suited to lap-sitting, except that I am bony. How can I make my presence in a lap more pleasant for the lap owner? - Nicholas/horsedreamer@davedot.com | |
| Bounce up and down. | |
| Hello Arty, will there ever be a day that you stop eating Donuts? - TsukiWulf/ Tsukiwulf@hotmail.com | |
| I laughed a good five minutes at your question. I mean, after all, that's presuming that one day in the future, a more perfect food will be invented. Blasphemy. | |
| Do you think the world is coming to an end? - Jacee | |
| No, because my credit card says "Expires 2010" and you can bet that financial institutions wouldn't take a risk like that. Besides. I'm pretty. | |
| where were you born - Deadrat | |
| Havre-de-Grace, Maryland. Now, while I'm not certain, but I'm pretty sure my mom was there. | |
| I'm offended. - K8 | |
| Good. That pain you feel is your mind attempting to open up against your will. | |
| lately i have been snaping at my friends and i dont mean to, there is alot of stress between finishing high school and haveing a job, what is the best way of releaveing stress? - Feral nabuza hotmail.com | |
| My favorite way right now is to snark at folk who, even in this day and age, don't use a spell checker, or a shift key. | |
| How do you get your hair so volumetric, Arty? - Growly@mac.com | |
| Cat spit. Also how it stays so clean and sexy. | |
| I'm a theoretical physicist working at a facility in New Mexico. I see a creepy, blue-suited man carrying a briefcase, on catwalks, on the other side of doors, etc. I can never get to him, and he disappears, even at dead ends. Should I be worried? - Gordon Freeman | |
| I would say not to worry. But keep a crowbar handy just in case. | |
| What happened to all the answered questions? - Amy Nesha | |
| In the great database corruption that happened a few months ago, a lot of questions were lost. There -are- a few thousand archived off, and they will be released again, soon. | |
| So, how long til Artys awesome tech skills allow a podcast of the show for us timezone challenged fans - sober.irish.guy gmail.com | |
| This has been under consideration for some time. Whether or not we roll out a podcast, there is no answer. Perhaps after June 2008. | |
| Hello, Mr. Sunspot. If you could marry Vinci, would you? - Kate | |
| Well, I'm going ring shopping, but don' tell him... | |
| What is the purpose of a rubber ducky? - Lightshade/dragonqueen393@yahoo.com | |
| Have you learned nothing from the greatness of Calvin & Hobbes? To test for sharks. | |
| Where do you find your claws to be most useful? - Kiru | |
| I find them to be at their most useful at the tips of my fingers, where I normally keep them. My claws will do me no good if I keep them in a shoebox under the bed. | |